Happy Valentine’s Day, fellow EO dorks!
Before I talk about how to feel more looove and spark your libido with essential oils, I’m going to go ahead and tell you that oils can’t do that.
Not alone, anyway.
You can use the smexiest essential oil perfume you like. If you’re too stressed or you aren’t comfortable with yourself, they won’t help much. Like, you can’t be overworked and anxious and busy-busy-busy all day, then expect a jasmine roll-on to immediately transport you to a relaxed, sensual mindset.
That said, if you have the intention to release stress, let go of your inhibitions, and awaken your senses to more pleasure, essential oils can 100% help you get there.
Think of them as support for sexy times. Not magic sex drops.
Valentines Day is about love and pleasure. Connection. Romance. Self-expression and happiness. These things require space to thrive.
Make a little space for yourself.
Open up a little corner of space and time where love can flourish.
If you have a partner, you’ll need this space to settle into your skin, to invite your spirit into your body, before you can really create a genuine connection. If you are your own partner, it’s all the more important. (When you’re disconnected from your spirit, loneliness can set in.)
If this space is your home, maybe clean it up first.
Clutter in your environment can create clutter in your mind.
Then use your favorite stress-calming oils to start feelin’ groovy. Your mind is your most important sex organ. Lavender can help you release anxieties and express yourself clearly.
If you need more in-depth help with stress, it’s here.
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Use oils to create a calming, sacred space
Try:
Palo santo (Bursera graveolens)
Lavender (Lavandula angustifolia)
Myrrh (Commiphora myrrha)
Sandalwood (Santalum album)
I like using a candle diffuser for times like this. It releases a gentler aroma than a plug-in one. And hey-hey, candles themselves are sexy. Who doesn’t look better in that romantic, storybook light?
PRO TIP: Be sure not to light the place on fire, while you’re lighting each others’ fire. The fire alarm takes you from “let’s fuck” to “oh fuck” real quick.
PRO TIP 2: Try not to diffuse oils your lover doesn’t like. If you hate lavender, nothing kills the sexy times like being in a room that reeks of it.
Once you’ve created a soothing, inviting corner of space and time, what if you have trouble getting your libido going?
Essential oils can actually help with this.
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Essential oils for a libido lift
Look, oils can’t make you randy.
But they can help you get there. Especially if you’re using them to massage one another, or for a self-massage.
Use oils that open your heart and encourage circulation.
Florals and spices combine beautifully—like rich, heady jasmine (Jasminum grandiflorum), sweet and spicy cardamom (Elettaria cardamomum), and a warm hint of spicy clove (Syzygium aromaticum).
Combinations like this help you feel relaxed and bold at once.
Spice oils that warm you and get circulation going are generally great for feeling confident and energized.
Adding them to florals can create super sensual aromas.
Just remember that both florals and spices are STRONG oils. Too many drops can quickly overwhelm you. Then you’ll have a headache, and that is a classic sexy times ruiner.
Try this massage oil blend.
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Sex Bomb Massage Oil
1 oz vanilla jojoba oil (Simmondsia chinensis)
2 drops jasmine oil (Jasminum grandiflorum)
5 drops cardamom oil (Elettaria cardamomum)
Combine the ingredients in a 1 oz glass bottle. Shake gently. Massage.
PRO TIP C: Do not, I repeat DO NOT, apply essential oils South of the Border. You know what I’m talkin about, Jean. Just because they can increase circulation, does not mean you should rub ‘em on your bits. Along with causing Very Unfortunate Skin Irritation, they’ll probably interact poorly with any lubes, condoms, or sex toys you’re using. So… don’t go there. If you use them for massage, wash your hands before handling your partner’s love zone.
PRO TIP 5: If you decide to use clove bud instead of cardamom, reduce the drop count to 2 or 3. And definitely, most definitely, wash your hands after.*
If you’d rather not use essential oils, just stick with pure vanilla-infused jojoba.
Vanilla has a classic warm sensual scent. And you don’t have to worry about washing your hands after using this carrier oil. Even sensitive skin tends to respond well to it.
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May your sexy times be joyful and your love carry you through the year!
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SAFETY TIP: Clove bud oil (Syzygium aromaticum) contains eugenol. It’s not right for people on blood thinning medication, or if you’ve just had surgery. Don’t apply it over damaged skin.